Rudolph the red nosed reindeer,

Had a very sunburned nose,

And if you ever did see him,

You’d say it looked like a rose.


Having one quick job in winter,

Paid as well as a top footballer,

His time was full of hard partying,

And a part time street brawler.


Jetting around the whole world,

Going to star studded gatherings,

In sun drenched VIP destinations,

Full of many drunken blunderings.


With many vixens by his flanks,

He was the undisputed stud,

Gold reins and diamond earrings,

He chewed the very finest cud.


The physique of a thoroughbred,

The strength of a large ox,

A fine specimen of a reindeer,

With world renowned hocks.


 His street brawls lasted seconds,

No matter his tough opponents,

Whether big, small, fast or quick,

Rudolph stopped them in moments.


His night time antics were famed,

With every nightclub reveller,

But he had one huge problem,

Which was a real big leveller.


This problem blighted his whole life,

Affected his choice of work,

He could not go out in the daylight,

In the shadows he would lurk.


He would get very bad sunburn,

Even the strobes would do it,

That’s why Rudolph’s nose is red,

That’s why he leads santa’s orbit.

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